A Flip in Perspective

December 17, 2013

Raise your hand if you've heard the question, or even asked it yourself, "Why do bad things happen to good people?" Lately, I've seen this question playing out before my eyes in multiple scenarios. I certainly didn't go looking for the answer. And I certainly can't say that this is the answer. But, with those caveats, here is my jumble of thoughts. 

Who's on the other side of the "missed" blessing?

Two women I work with have experienced significant hardships in the past two months. One had a husband with a near-fatal heart attack, who is still not recovering well. The other tripped on some stairs and ended up having to get 100+ stitches all over her face. In both scenarios, they were out of work for over a month. No income, significant medical issues...it looks like the perfect scene for everyone to shake their heads and say "why do bad things happen to good people?" So why did these bad things happen? Because Autumn needed to make her car payment. Nicolette needed to pay for school. And Taylor needed rent money. That's right. Three, stereotypical broke (and in my case, always starving) waitresses benefited from these seeming "bad things to good people." While it sounds awful, we were slightly thrilled at the bad news because we needed those hours. While they were gone, it gave three broke college students time to get a little extra money that doesn't normally make itself magically available. 

And another scenario happened this past weekend. I needed some M time. Like some hard core, love on Autumn time. M gets one day off per week, and his priority that day is spending time with his daughter. Understandably so. We usually spend the day all three of us together. But for some reason (and as I type this, I realize I sound so needy)...I just needed a Sunday where it was the two of us, and not the three of us. Unfortunately there is no good way to ask your boyfriend to not see his toddler daughter for a couple extra hours because you need some solo attention (because that makes you a bitch, ladies and gentleman). But, lo and behold, while I'm over here in my mind trying to figure out how to get a few hours of alone time, little E got sick. And I got a whole day. A whole, blessed day of alone time. And it made me sigh a sigh of relief. Nobody wishes for a little girl to get sick. But I did wish for alone time. And trust me, I totally indulged. 

I guess what I'm thinking here in this little ol' head o' mine is that maybe there's always someone on the other side of the blessing. Or maybe, if you believe in karma, there's only so much good that can go around at once. Ying and yang and all that shit. It's not about the universe intentionally having it out for you. What I wish is that when I'm down and depressed and crying about "why me" someday, I can remember this post and maybe turning my thinking upside down for 30 seconds will help me remember that in my time of trial, someone is getting a much needed break. Maybe. And I can't say that this post explains why bad things are happening in Syria or why there are still school shootings. Maybe there's a difference between our perception of bad and true evil. But maybe the little blocks help build the bigger picture. And if we practice our understanding of how God is present in the little, every day things of our own life we might one day see Him in the bigger picture.

Why do bad things happen to good people?
On a scale of one to ten, how needy does this post make me sound?

Basically, what I'm saying and noticing lately is summed up by this song lyric:
"To realize that your future is somebody else's past."
-my main man, Lupe Fiasco

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  1. I don't think you sound needy at all! Everybody has wants and needs...it's all just a delicate balance :)

  2. You are definitely not needy! Most girls need way more attention than that! :) Sometimes it's okay to be selfish

  3. I do believe there is balance in the world, so you could definitely be right. Sometimes, I think are hardships may also lead to a greater happiness. For example, the woman whose husband had a heart attack. Let's just say he eventually gets better and, although the trial was hard and scary, their marriage is better than it would have ever been.

    Maybe that's a bad example. My point is, maybe bad things happen because, without them, the good things wouldn't be as good.

  4. I've never thought about it that way. The small building blocks/the future (your co-worker missing work, giving you more hours) adding up to the bigger blocks/past (the misfortunes of your co-workers, that gave you more hours to work = bigger paycheck).

    Have you ever had a moment where some saying smacks you in the face? Lupe Fiasco and you just did it to me.

  5. I don't think you sound needy :) I'm sure man friends would like to hang with me solo sometimes. Although sick Boomer means no Whit either :) I think ...and whoa I'm going to sound SUPER new agey, but there is balance in everything. There just is.

  6. First of all, you don't sound needy! At all. As far as bad things happening to good people... I've come to find out that bad things happen to everyone. Whenever I was a kid and said "Why me?" My Mom would always say "Why NOT you?"

  7. I can totally understand what you are talking about. I was in the hospital last week and the women who covered my shift needed it so bad to help save money for christmas gifts. While in the bed I realized that, and although I was in pain (that i knew was temp) I was happy to know that a christmas just got a little bit better!



Your comments make my day! Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts.

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