State of: Blogging 2014

December 30, 2013

Who knows what this post will turn out to be. Partial weekend update. Partial Freud analysis. Partial broad, sweeping generalizations without saying anything. Absolute, crazy ramblings? Yes. That I can guarantee. 

Here's the thing. I haven't been blogging as much of late. As I mentioned earlier, part of that is because I am being insanely harsh on myself with where I am in life right now and that's not really something pretty to blog about. I've started and stopped more posts than I can count. When I started looking back through my posts to do a year in review summary, I became positively fed up with how cheerful they were. Five posts a week of absolute. bullshit. Not that I want this space to become depressing, or grim or even my personal journal. But. I do want it to be an accurate reflection of my life. And life is not all sassy moments and giggles. Mostly. But not always. 

It's hard to balance how much truth to let out on this little space. Because of course in any of our lives, we are not the sole characters. And so not only do I struggle with how much "real," I struggle with respecting the privacy of the other main actors in my life. Blogging is a very solo act. And sometimes that's great, but that's also not very real.

Back and forth back and forth. 

I think the second straw that broke the proverbial back was the latest link-up that went around about "If I were telling the truth...." Did I absolutely love the idea? Yes. Did I love how purely honest women got about hating blogging, doubting themselves and getting jealous? Yes. Did I hate that it took a one-time-only link-up to make people feel it was acceptable to voice the negative for once in their life? YES. Why do we only share our struggles and messy parts when someone decides it's okay for a 10 day link up? Yes, I want to be uplifted when I come to Bloglandia. Yes, I want to giggle. But I also don't want to feel like shit because I'm being painted a fake picture that all these talented, well-rounded women have their lives together 24/7/365 with plenty of time for DIY, nail painting and wine sipping. Because that's not real. And it should be okay to talk about what we're struggling with more than once a year when a link-up goes big. (Though it was a great link-up, don't get me wrong.)

Basically, I've found two things in looking back at an almost-year's worth of blogging. 
1) My posts are not fully reflective of the wide spectrum of life. I describe my blog as Unreal--both the "hysterically how do you get yourself in that situation" and the "this would only happen to you, how" situation. Mostly, I've been sticking to hysterical. I want to find a way to make it more reflective of the whole range of life, while still not making it a personal journal (though isn't that in actuality what they are?). 
2) If I can't write about everything, I tend to write about nothing. And I'd rather write than not write. So I'm sorry if you come here for the sass and are disappointed that there will be a broader spectrum of posts. The sass will still be there, frequently--that I can promise. But, I can't be sassy without everything else too. 

In the end, the struggle is this. I want the blog to be more honest, but I don't want to lose readers. I struggle with the idea that people come to Bloglandia for honesty. I think they come for a distraction. For entertainment. And sometimes honesty, but not too much. I've seen completely honest blogs fail while blogs with top-ten lists and sassy gifs who never publish "content" soar.  So, personal jury is still out on the priority of "honesty" in blogs.

And as for the weekend update, I've come to the end and realized that I'm not really ready to blog about that yet. Which seems unfair, to request prayers and yet say "but I can't tell you why." It makes me feel like I'm in 6th grade bargaining secrets for best friends. I don't know.

Sorry for the semi-shitty post. 

But in actuality, not sorry. 

And if you made it to the end of that long ass post, thank you! You win a puppy. Just kidding I don't have puppies.

How will your blog change in 2014? 
Why do you come to Bloglandia?

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  1. Just do you, girl! I have a blog to write about the things I want to share (positive or negative) and I have an actual paper, bound notebook/diary for things I don't want to share (positive or negative). Don't let What Everyone Else Is Doing On Their Blogs impact how you approach yours. Do YOU.

  2. I've realized too that it can be really difficult sometimes to balance how personal you are on your blog with how you want the blog to 'come across.' You don't want to seem too disingenuous, but you don't want it to be too dark in those moments where life just doesn't want to be all sparkles and sunshine like the blog may make it seem. I'm not sure that 'honest blogs' and huge readership go hand in hand. Like you mentioned, a lot of it does come down to distraction, and in a lot of cases, inspiration. It's hard to combine truthy posts with high readership. But being honest with yourself about your blog... that's the most important thing. If you don't feel like you're being 'real' to yourself, and that's how you enjoy blogging, then of course you aren't going to enjoy it as much!

    One of the best things I've learned about more personal posts is to write them, but then sit on them for a day or two so that I can look back at them objectively when I'm not so hung up on the emotions that caused me to write them in the first place. Then they can actually be really successful. Or, to make them more blog-friendly, using a personal experience that I feel strongly about, but turning it into a numbered 'top 5' post or whatever... the catch-titles that attract readership, but don't distract from your blog as a whole.

    Just thoughts, kinda rambly. ;)


    Artsy Abroad //

  3. You're one of the bloggers I know will be more real than the rest. You aren't always sunshine and butterflies and that's more real than anything else. Everyone has rough periods and what makes you real is how you share it.

    I'm with you on the whole not wanting to a Debbie downer and thats okay. That's why I make a list of post ideas when they come to me so I won't always have a downer post if I've posted a few recently.

    But, either way, YOU are awesome. That's the most important thing to remember.

  4. this is so so true. im with you on writing abotu everything. i just cant seem to fit into a category. and im fine with that. i love your posts- keep it up.

  5. I literally just un subscribed from all but 10blogs in bloglovin bc (1) i made my old blog private (although felipe says he can still see it so who knows!) bc i don't feel like I have time anymore and (2) I AM SO TIRED OF READING BLOGS ABOUT NOTHING! .... Haha but the point is I wish more people would be more honest ... Which is to say that I will keep reading as along as you keep writing!!!

    Love ya girl!!

  6. My vote is that you write multiple blogs about whatever is running through your head. Some days, I have nothing, and other days there are a million things I want to tell the world. Turn those many things into many posts and then give yourself a break for a week as they roll out.

    In terms of respecting people's privacy, that only matters if people you know are aware you blog (in my opinion). For example, I don't like to say anything too personal about my boyfriend because, while he doesn't read my blog, we share friends who do. A safer route is to talk about how things are affecting you. You don't have to give readers a reason for your feelings. All we have to know is how you feel. If you have a stream of depressing blogs, so what? I can bet you will get a ton of support from your readers. Believe me when I say nothing can lift your spirits like a bunch of supportive comments. It's especially helpful if you don't feel comfortable expressing those feelings to anyone in real life.

  7. I hate niches because they make us all confused about why we're stuck in this little box but hate it.... I believe that every blog is a lifestyle blog and that our lives are composed of pure craziness -mess, fun, honest and not. Craziness nonetheless.

    I love your stuff -random or not. And screw all those who can't feel the love too!

  8. I love this. It basically explains exactly how I feel. I started out this year doing fairly well with blogging & keeping it real...then life happened & I wasn't ready to blog about unhappy things. To those that leave your blog behind because you decide to keep it real...SCREW EM! I have every intent of doing the same this coming year because I'm bored with what my blog has come.

  9. I completely relate to this post. What I post isn't lies, it is stuff that has happened or that I am interested in but I tend to leave out the messy parts. For instance one of my best friends died 3 weeks ago and the happy post continue when I am hurt inside. Here's to sharing a "messy" 2014!

  10. I love your blog! You write in a way that engages and intrigues me... regardless of what you write about! Keep doin' yo' thang, guuuurl! ;P

  11. girl write about whatever feels right! I love honest posts! I think people will love whatever direction you feel inspired to go in because they'll feel your passion behind the post!


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