Yesterday, I had to suck it up and do that thing that ruins your day because it just never works out the way you want it to: bra shopping. Specifically, strapless bra shopping (I know, my face was screwed up in a disgusted look the whole time too, I feel you girl). My motto: in and out. Get the first strapless bra I see and just beeline it to the register.
So I ask the perky little shop lady where my size is.
She looks skeptically.
"Have you lost a lot of weight lately?"
"Ummm...not that I know of?"
"We need to remeasure you."
"Oh umm...are your hands warm? Are you a trained professional? Is that measuring ribbon made of satin, my ladies are sensitive." Or something incoherent came out.
Turns out all those once a week yoga trips and rage running to rap music and eating lots of vegetables has actually been working, because this little bitch lost FOUR INCHES. At first I was all UNICORNS AND CELEBRATE and then I was all FUCK THIS SHIT, BRAS ARE TOO EXPENSIVE. For real. That's what PopSugar doesn't tell you: Weight Loss Is Expensive.
So I sucked it up and bought some new pairs (and a strapless that I begged for them to overnight because #wedding #helpme). But here are some things that I will drop serious dollars on and not complain:
1. Skin Care
One time, I saw those gross pictures of two twins next to each other and the left was all "she wore sunscreen and washed her face" and the other was "she went tanning and fake baking" and I threw up. The saleswoman at the counter was like "You can pay to keep your skin healthy now, or you can pay to try and correct it later." And now I always shell out ze money for quality creams.
2. Large, abstract turquoise paintings
Yesterday my neighbor left her door open, and I literally ran into the wall because she had a stunning abstract, turquoise painting above her couch. I waited on my stoop until she came back up with her laundry and then I didn't even beat around the bush. I was all "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT PAINTING, I'M OBSESSED, THANKS FOR LEAVING YOUR DOOR OPEN."
And then I immediately went inside and bought the exact same painting. Creeper.
It's coming in 3-5 days, thank you World Market.
3. Eating Out
This is the most frivolous of my expenditures, for sure. But I will literally never not shell out for good food. I. Love. Food. If I do not profess my love of a good meal at least once a day, something is wrong. I generally gchat my friends at around 9:30, 9:45 to start talking about lunch because FOOD.
A good meal, in my opinion, is always worth it. Oh thrift spenders, I wish I had your appetite control.