There. I said it. The secret is out. I hate it. Pancakes, waffles, sunny side eggs...disgusting. All of it.
What really grinds my gears the most about breakfast food is this:Who decided that certain foods should only be eaten in the morning? Who decided which foods would qualify for this? And if breakfast really is the most important meal of the day, why are most breakfast foods sugar-based? Why do some people think brinner is the best thing since sliced bread? And why is sliced bread our comparison for greatness?
I get really, really irrationally worked up about this. I remember getting my Big Sister for my sorority and filling out my "Get To Know Me" sheet. For "Favorite Breakfast Food" I wrote in large capitals with lots of underlines I HATE ALL BREAKFAST FOOD. Turns out our family tradition was monthly breakfasts at a diner. Womp womp.
Sometimes, being a breakfast-hater is a lonely thing. Sometimes, people hold unnecessary grudges against breakfast-haters. For example...
During our first week of class, we had to write an interesting fact about ourselves to give to our professor. The boy next to me and I were struggling. I don't really keep a list of interesting facts about me tucked away, no matter how many times I've played two truths and lie or gone through a sorority recruitment event. So eventually, I wrote "I hate all breakfast food."
He literally, physically recoiled. He recoiled from my interesting fact.
So here we are. Three weeks later. Two hours into our three hour class. And we're chatting a little bit about our other mutual class and paper topics and I said something about being done with an assignment he hadn't started and I hear "well at least I like breakfast food."
I'm sorry. What? It has been THREE WEEKS. Can we get past this please?
And then he proceeded to name every single breakfast option and ask me. No. No. No. Finally, I give in.
Well, I do like corn beef hash, I say.
HE RECOILS AGAIN. AGAIN.
"Of all the breakfast foods, and that's the one you like?"