November 6, 2013

Lately my life has been defined by seemingly extreme opposites. A dichotomy. I feel two sides pulling, and I don't necessarily want to give either one up. But that's an issue for another day. Another day, another deep post. But today is Wednesday, and I'm going to do a Wednesday weekend update because it's my blog and I do what I want. And because I've been thinking about this dichotomy a lot lately, and nothing better expresses it than the insanity that was this weekend. 
Part of me really likes being a grad student. Really likes being young and 20something and giggling with her girlfriends and drinking way, way too many shots. Really likes overhearing drunk girls crying on the corner because their boyfriend asked to borrow their blanket and "it's a shawl, damn it!"

And part of me really likes being a grown up(ish)...thing. After a night on the town Saturday, M and I did a total 180 and went from 20somethings to 40somethings. Just kidding. But you get the point. We picked up his daughter and headed over for family lunch. I just....loved it. I loved all the kids running around and the way there was no schedule. With my family, everything is on a schedule--when are we playing, when are we eating, when are the kids having down time. And there was no schedule. The kids played soccer and they ran around and the whole family gathered in the living room to watch them play Just Dance. They'd pick a song and the mom would go, Oh I just love watching them do this song. And I couldn't help but think how sweet that she even knows that. That she knows which songs are her favorite--because clearly she's watched a lot. And I'd look over and see one of the kids had crawled like a monkey up onto his dad's shoulders and they were both just sitting there, watching the dances. I absolutely adore families who are so content to just be together. They don't have to have a plan. 
After dancing and lunching and plenty of coloring and hair braiding, we left. We dropped the dear off with her mom and headed home. I cleaned, he watched TV. We ordered pizza. I fell asleep in a ball on the couch 20 minutes into the movie. It was so perfectly normal. It was like a sweet breath of fresh air, saying "Don't worry. Papers and tests and the uncertainty of "what job next?" will end. And when it does end....you get this. Family. Love. Routine. Normalcy." 

Do you have dichotomies in your life?
What would you pick--wild night out, or calm night in?

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  1. so lovely how you worded that about the family being so content together, i could actually picture what you were writing. and i can understand the feeling of dichotomy, too much so!

  2. I feel similar some days. I miss college, but I also love coming home from work and not having to worry about assignements and studying. I think it's all apart of our 20s :)

  3. I have this sometimes, but mostly because I started the whole mommy grownup thing early at 21. My friends are all catching up now, so that helps a little. There's no rule that says you can't have a little of both.

  4. For a while I struggled with the independent/single me vs. count on someone/taken me. It's hard to balance, but after a while, you get in a groove and understand how to work the best of those two situations. I don't think either one is something to not do - but learn which one you value more and then throw in the other one occasionally.

  5. Some Friday nights I feel like I might die if I have to stay cooped up in the house, others you couldn't get me off the couch and out of my jammies for a thousand bucks. I guess that's the beauty of your 20's.. either way goes!

  6. i definitely had those dichotomies for awhile too, but now i've settled into old lady 'normalcy' (i guess). sometimes i realize we're kinda boring and that my 23 year old self would be appalled at my lack of weekend plans, but it is nice just sorta being more of a homebody now. but definitely enjoy both sides too!
    -- jackie @ jade and oak

  7. I totally get you! I am such a grandma/wild child. My coworker called me a 20-something with an old soul.

  8. I crave family time like that. I have no kids and just one nephew, so my family is kind of quiet.


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